Our unconscious search for control
All of us, whether we are consciously doing it or not, are in search of some level of control in our lives. And this is not necessarily a bad thing. Control gives us a sense of direction and helps us maintain balance to one degree or another. However, there is a clear distinction between control and self-control. As I’m writing these words, my mind is racing, trying to grasp so many different meanings as this topic is pretty complex and could very well steer off in so many directions. I don’t want to write a very long post, so I will try to be as concise as I can, which is my favorite thing to do anyway. And I doubt anyone reads long posts these days, so it’ll be a win for both.
There are natural forces in nature that we cannot deny. Everything in nature is constantly in motion, including ourselves. Even the rocks we deem dead things because they do not contain cells are ruled by their own cycles. According to the yogis, these forces, or better said, these qualities of nature, are the three gunas (Sattva, Rajas, Tamas) that are inherent in everything and everyone. Even in Hindu cosmology, these gunas are considered the first three principles that bring the Universe into motion. And if there are no gunas, if there are no distinct qualities or tendencies than there is no plot and there is no story in the end. So essentially, these things make up life as we know it.
Rising above duality
In various schools, whether it’s personal development, psychology, spirituality, or even religion, we find the concept of duality. Duality is not necessarily a definitive judgment of good and bad because it is not our job to do so. If anything, it is God’s job to say who is right and who is wrong, as he is the all-seeing or all-witnessing eye, no matter how hard we try to hide our conduct. Rising above duality is first an internal process of learning to witness instead of criticizing.
When we judge our thoughts or even qualities about ourselves, we are stuck in duality. We are stuck in partiality. But if we learn to witness it all, we learn to surrender without judging or criticizing. These judgments we have toward ourselves come in the form of words. And I’m highlighting ourselves because I couldn’t care less about what you have to say about others. Authentic, harmonious, and everlasting change can only occur when we first embrace inner change. So, the words we speak to judge ourselves may be silent and subtle, but they are there and forever present until we learn to listen. Or until we are forced to scream or cry them out loud. But often, when we are stubborn as a mule, we’ll start to project these judgments outwardly because we cannot take the pain of retrospection and accountability.
If we constantly criticize ourselves and different things in our lives, we take away the joy of living. It is the same as going to the Cinema. You don’t go to the Cinema to judge every single thing, character, or mistake that a director makes. You go there to witness the story and enjoy the movie. You also don’t go there to become hyperfocused with one character or an aspect of that story because then you lose sight of everything else that is beautiful and present.
Fire & purification
The quickest way to self-realization is through fire and purification. This fire is the fire of spirit. Life itself is fire. The drama, the trauma, and the scariest moment you face are the very same fire that spirit is trying to purify you in because as you face that fire, you can surrender control and, therefore, are reborn through that same fire. Once we surrender control, we are able to transmute fear into trust and wisdom. All the suffering we face, whether others know about it or not, is fire. All scriptures highlight the importance of sacrifice when it comes to our highest self-realization. But what is it that we have to sacrifice? Well first and foremost, it is about sacrificing our attachments. And attachments come in all forms and sizes, but the most dangerous one of all is our attachment to an idea of who we are without having delved into our body, without having truly understood and felt the entirety of who we are. And that is perpetuating a cycle of duality and suffering.
Words and inner alchemy
Words are empty if we don’t mean them. A lot of people who, for the first time now, since more and more “magical” concepts are coming to light, use quantum jumping and manifesting as if it were some kind of children’s game. And trust me, this is no game. You can’t manifest out of thin air or by repeating words like a parrot. Often, we think we are in control of what we manifest and how, and maybe to some degree, yes, we may be able to build momentum and speed up the process of manifestation. But only after the process of purification, and purification is not possible if you don’t know what you have to purify in the first place.
For instance, if you don’t actually know which words will help you manifest and work in harmony and coherence with the frequency at which you are currently vibrating, you are wasting your time. Also, you have to remember that you are bound to a whole intelligent system of codes and patterns, and you must work through those patterns consciously and patiently to actually transform them. You have to dip in the fire no matter what. You may find some new-age coaches with flowy bohemian outfits that will tell you otherwise and that you don’t have to work hard to manifest this or that, but at the heart of it all, everything requires discipline and hard work. But if you choose to go the other route, go ahead and try it yourself and let me know how it goes. I’m curious.
Empowering yourself is not as easy as people make it out to be these days. If it were that easy, then we’d all be gurus and enlightened beings floating around in peace and harmony all day. When we face our scariest moments, we can witness what we have been programmed to be and do for generations and generations but are now presented with a choice to do something differently, and that is a gift. Yes, it is painful, but I guess that old proverb is still valid. With no pain, there’s no gain. So yes, words are important and will help you in the process of inner alchemy, but only after you clearly witness the programs and patterns you have been conditioned by in your family line. It is also as equally important to understand why it was or has been that way. Often, when we search for the why, what we despise about our caretakers may very well be pointing at something that was unconsciously passed down to us that needs to be addressed within ourselves. And sometimes, when we search for the why, we are taken back to hundreds if not thousands of years of history.
