When it comes to outlook and attitude, it is said that a person will fall into one of two categories. If you’re like me, you’re one of the glass-half-full people. You see water floating in a glass at the halfway point between the bottom and the brim, and you take note of the fact that there is a cup and that there is water. But it doesn’t really occur to you that some of the glass is empty because all you see is what is there, not what is lacking. And then, of course, there’s the glass-half-empty sort of people. They see the same glass with the same amount of water, and instead of taking awareness of what exists in front of them, they focus on the fact that the glass lacks more water than it can hold. Something is missing, and that missing portion is the first thing they notice about the same cup sitting before us that falls into the other category of having a scarcity mindset.
Never Enough
Often, the ones that saw the glass and were immediately drawn to what it lacked aren’t necessarily negative people. Then again, they may very well be individuals with that impossibly high standard who are never happy, no matter what they have or how much. No matter what or who they have in their life, it is just never enough. They could be hired at their dream job, meet their perfect match, or come into more money than they know what to do with and somehow still be stuck on the idea that they need more. They may have what they need and then some, but because they are stuck in what is known as a scarcity mindset, nothing will ever be enough. They may even obsess over how much more they could have and how getting it is of the utmost importance because the thing they seek exists in limited supply.
There is never enough money or time, and even when they do feel joy with something or someone that comes into their life, it doesn’t take long before they need more. Greedy, needy, and forever unsatisfied. People with such an outlook are going to be extremely miserable. Even when they are happy with something that’s come to them, the happiness is short-lived. They may have a lot of friends, plenty of financial stability, a job with all the benefits that one could ever want or need, and the perfect mate. Still, the happiness of such things comes in short supply. Much like the things they are convinced exist in finite quantities, the people who care about and love them tend never to be quite enough. They may find themselves in a great, solid, and healthy relationship only to sabotage the entire thing because, for some reason, they can’t help but feel like they could do better.
They could have been pursuing their significant other for months or even years, desiring them on a very intense level only to win them over, just to conclude that they’re not that great and they could do better. It’s a hell of a deal for their lover because they may be the best of the best, and it wouldn’t matter. It won’t have anything to do with them lacking certain traits that would make them more appealing. It’s all about the fact that the person they are with is always looking for greener grass. After all, it’s always on the other side of where they are. These “forever unsatisfied” folks aren’t necessarily bad people. They’re just mixed up. They can be their own worst enemy. With the way things are in this world, getting stuck in this sort of mentality can be an easy thing to do. Everything is fast-paced, ever-evolving, and constantly being replaced with newer and better versions.
Finding Balance
If you’re one of many who have reached a higher level of self-awareness, you have probably come to the realization that you deserve the very best. You know your worth, and you won’t settle for less because you have found love for yourself. You aren’t going to go through life only accepting what you can get, but you’re going to take what you want and what you know for damn sure you deserve. As well you should. All of us deserve the best. We deserve the money we need to survive and live comfortably. We deserve to have a job that we enjoy, and that makes us happy each time we show up to it. We deserve the love of someone who knows they are luckier than hell to have us. We deserve friends that treat us as well as we treat ourselves. We deserve the finest things personal to us and the most loyal, loving people.
However, finding all that and knowing all that you have without wanting or needing more can be a happy medium that isn’t all that easy to reach. It’s one of those catch-22 types of deals, one of those things that go from healthy to just plain delusional. I’m not going to pretend to know for sure, but for the most part, those of us that have come to know our worth and won’t settle for anything less than what we most definitely deserve were most likely not always all that aware of the fact that we are worthy. We had to work at becoming aware of just how important our needs and wants are. It took years and years of self-development work and overcoming many hardships. It didn’t register with us from day one.
Learning to love ourselves and knowing we are not just enough but recognizing how wonderful we each are individually was a process that required time and effort, and that’s because that’s what being a human is. It’s recognizing that you can improve and that you have to work at bettering yourself all the time. So, if someone reaches that level of awareness but gets a little mixed up along the way and becomes stuck in a scarcity mindset, they aren’t just aware of what they should have but also begin to obsess with the fact of deserving the best to the point where they are constantly seeking more. In this case, it’s safe to say that some inner work can still be done. If all the things I’m talking about are hitting you to the point that you’re starting to question whether or not you are maybe at that point, you may be taking notice of the fact that you’ve gone too far in your journey of knowing your worth and stopping at nothing until you get the best of the best, don’t worry.
How To Find Balance | Scarcity Mindset
Perhaps you’re starting to understand that your relationships are always failing because you are always looking for more, and your desires have gone from healthy to totally impossible. That’s okay. You can always forgive yourself. Much like the work you’ve done on yourself in the past, there’s plenty of work you can still do to get yourself or someone you care about out of a scarcity mindset and into what’s known as an abundant mindset. If you’re reading this and someone or several different people are popping into your mind, I’ve got some info that you may want to pass to them that may just change their life and help them become less miserable. Because let’s face it, people who live with a scarcity mindset are most likely pretty miserable. I will list a few suggestions I’ve discovered for changing unsatisfactory and outdated ways of thinking. They’re all pretty simple and, honestly, quite beneficial exercises for all of us to get involved with.
The first thing I suggest to help shift your mindset is very easy, but it is something that needs practice, so you’ll need to do it each and every day. All you need for this exercise is something to write on and something to write with. Get a notebook or a journal and keep it near your bed or somewhere close to where you have your morning coffee or breakfast. Once you’re good and awake, take a few minutes and write down a list of all the things you have. I mean, everything. Really think about all the people, things, and blessings you’ve got at that very moment and list them. On one of my lists, you’ll find all sorts of randomness. It’ll go from a roof and a bed to my caboodle of makeup. Or from my small group of true friends to my ability to forgive and love despite being poorly treated. You’ll most likely find that you have so much more to be grateful for.
Secondly, shift out of a scarcity mindset by trying to set out at least a few moments a day for some meditation. Take time to reflect and focus on being content at the moment and being satisfied with everything in your life. Send out positive, loving vibes to the people who mean the most to you. Be aware and be grateful. And last but not least, try making a list of goals and dreams that you’d like to achieve. Make them realistic but great. Put them in writing so that you can return to what you wrote and acknowledge when you’ve reached each of your goals. That way, you have a frame of reference and don’t become obsessed and go overboard. It’s okay to get lost and get overzealous, but don’t live there. I’ll leave you with a little something I once read that really changed my life: Once you become aware of something, you become responsible for it. So, if you’re aware of the fact that you’re getting a little ridiculous in your desires, stop. Your happiness is your responsibility.
